How to bury your mother

Here is a story my friend Lee told me when we were both sixteen: 
“When I was little, mum used to leave me with the guy next door.  He used to take my clothes off and tie me to the kitchen table.  Then he’d stick things up my arse.  I remember him chasing me around the [...]

Inland

Do we draw borders around love?  Do we take a great land and make it little with our littleness?  I know that I have at different times of my life. 
Take the time when I was 19. I went for a trip inland with my brother in law Jake who was a sales rep for some [...]

200 Philistine Foreskins

I think in the back of every atheist’s mind is the comforting thought that, even if they got it wrong and Heaven and Hell do exist, God will give them credit for integrity.  I mean, not believing in God is the expression of the very free will God granted, isn’t it?  And, if we are to [...]

The upside down river

I grew up on a large empty river, lined with gum trees and winding outwards from the heart of my empty country. Along time ago the Ingaada people lived there. It was peaceful enough around the river’s mangroved and windblown mouth until the squatters came and then the missionaries.  After that, the Ingaada were gone forever. 
But that [...]

Hands-free masturbation

I can’t believe that I joined one of those online dating agencies last week.  And only a year after the last time. 

Suddenly I am inundated by the virtual kisses of people who want to treat me to candle-lit dinners and empty moonlit beaches.  Yeah, right. But I’ve been there, I’m afraid.  And I know what [...]

8 Random things about Oscarandre

I was once married to a perfectionist until I decided that I couldn’t spend my life scrubbing flaws. 
For a while I flirted with being gay but found that this lifestyle cannot be sustained on the simple premise that the world is full of arseholes.
I have the temperament of an artist but without any redeeming [...]